Category: Out and About

Sydney started pre-school today and so I’m feeling a bit old right about now. Mind you, not the my joints creak when I move sort of old and certainly not the I’m going to pop a 4 hour purple pill kind of seriously old. Yet, today Misses Piggles headed off to her first day of school. This means at 3 years of age, I now have 15 more years of school shopping to do. This year it was a princess backpack and Hello Kitty lunchpail. Who knows what it will be in two years when she heads off to school. I’m betting it won’t be a Lost Abbey lunch box. Nope, it’s going to take us a few more years to reach that level of sophisticated marketing for sure. But just so you know, we’re working on it.

It must have been a hell of a day at school for her. I can only imagine what it must be like to be dropped off at school for the first time. Thing is, I killed that brain cell many years ago. That whole Norm theory about weak buffaloes and all. Pretty sure that one ran off the edge when I was like 9. But, today was a great day and I am looking forward to heading home to hear all about it. There will be so much excitement and talk of her new friends. I’m most interested in how lunch went. See today, Sydney had to eat lunch all by herself. And given that no one told her in which order to eat things, I am certain the sandwich was last to go. Mind you, it was probably eaten (she’s a voracious little eater) but I’m sure it went last.

Tonight, I am heading home to fire up the juicer and squeeze fresh daddy lemonade (limes, Reposado, Sugar and Ice). I know it should be a cold beer sort of night but there’s always beer in my life and not enough Tequila. Plus, if you keep poisoning the same brain cells with the same poison, don’t they grow stronger? (The Norm theory of drinking). So tonight, we’re going big. Brit and Tami Antrim are in town and visiting. I’m sure Sydney will make them laugh. Me, I’ll laugh the whole night knowing that my brain cells are getting stronger, my hair thinner, as my waistline expands. Sydney started school today. What on earth has this world come to?

It’s that time of year when kids across this country are actually dragged by their ears to the malls of America so that they can kick and scream on some watered down version of Santa as he listens to “Little Jaunito” tell him about wanting a “Red Rider Uzi with Matching Bandana.”

I happen to avoid the mall like the plague. As we all know, they don’t sell Cantillon in the Kiosks so what’s the point of trudging through the aisles looking for something that doesn’t exist. I for one believe in Santa Claus but the older I get, the more I tend to want to believe in Cantillon Claus. You know the one that eats the cookies and leaves a bottle of Lou Pepe Framboise behind!

Now that I am a father of a child who “understands” Christmas, it is somewhat more difficult to go shopping. No longer can we go down the aisle at Target and pick up things for her even though she’s sitting in the shopping cart. It sucks. But the upside is it means she’s that much closer to being able to brew her own beer.

As you may recall, last year, we got Sydney her very own My First Homebrewers Kitchen. She has literally worn out the mash paddle with each and every batch. She’s a prodigous kitchen brewer that Sydney. She brews 2-3 times a week just like her dear old dad. Now that she’s a year older, I’ve returned to the crossroads of responsible parenting and Christmas. You see, this year, she wants a bicycle of her very own. Maureen and I are all for that. We have a large carport she can safely ride in so why not. She’s already told Santa that it needs to be Pink. Ok that shouldn’t be too hard.

Yet, as we all know, if you want to be the coolest kid on the block your bike better have some serious accessories on board. So, I’ll be keeping an eye out this year for the kinds of things that are bound to make hers’ the baddest and most trickest trike on the block. I already have a bid on a vintage license plate to hang off the seat. It was easy finding a Duvel Metal License plate. But, they’re a bit more liberal about these things in Belgium. I looked high and low for one in pink but the best I could do was White, Red and Black. Sorry Sydney! Daddy is good. He can turn Barley into beer but he can’t make Duvel pink! (You’ll learn soon enough that’s a job for even bigger corporations)

Now that I have properly decked out the seat of the bike, I’ll be turning my attention to the handle bars. As we all know, no trike would be complete without a beverage holder. So, I found a sweet swivel unit on line (in Chrome no less) that rotates as she rides as to not spill her beverage. As she has graduated from a sippy cup to a real cup this is very important. As we all know, no one likes to cry over spilt milk.

From the same online site, I acquired the requisite Frame and Ice Chest combination for the back deck of the trike. This was a tough sell to her mom. She was concerned that perhaps Sydney would end up with too many beverages on board causing her to become “tipsy.” And as we all know, Drinking and Triking is a serious no no.

This is why I was able to convince her mother that we should absolutely spring for the “My First Pedal Lock Breathalyzer.” Thing is, I’m having a hard time finding one of these. My conversations last year prepared me for the inevitable “I’m sorry sir we don’t stock breathalyzers that read Vitamin D levels on your child’s breath.” But I thought without a doubt, I would be able to acquire one somehow. So if anyone out there knows of a place where I can purchase one, I would really appreciate it. I can’t let Sydney Milk and Trike. That would be irresponsible parenting to say the least.

Oh and speaking of responsible Triking, I have one essential piece that I need to acquire. It seems that Sydney really wants a Pink Princess Helmet. It’s gonna suck when she opens the one on Christmas Day that I got for her. It’s Gray with Flying Pink Elephants (Thank you Delerium Tremens!). Like any great father, I will explain that they were all sold out of the Pink Princess Helmets but had these awesome Pink Dumbo ones in stock. Sydney’s pretty smart so I figure it will take her about a week to figure out those aren’t Dumbo. Flying Elephants yes, Dumbo No.

But it won’t matter. Because by then, she’ll be the coolest kid in the carport. Each morning she’ll peddle out the garage with an ice chest loaded with Milk for her friends. Pink Elephants will flap in the breeze on her helmet as she peddles down the drive. I’ll be momentarily disappointed that Dogfishead was out of Cycling Jerseys in 2T. But Sam will make it up with a trailer for the trike with some kind of new fangled orgonoleptic chocolate infusing milk back as an yet to be invented accessory for her trike.

And on that Friday December 26, 2008 I will smile from work at my uber slick parenting skills. Sydney’s Tricked out Trike will have a Devil for a license plate and a pedal lock should she ever think about overindulging on Vitamin D before peddling. I can go to work each day safe in the knowledge that I have provided for her and that no way in hell is there going to be a cooler kid in the carport than her! And that my friends is what I call responsible parenting…

It’s hard to imagine not wanting to drink a beer. But, that’s exactly how I felt yesterday. AND, it was the first day in a VERY long time that I didn’t “want” a beer. Denver has a way of doing that to you. 6 days of marathon like consumption has a way of beating you down. Yes it was an amazing week of beer and I am thankful that it is over (at least the consumption part).

On Saturday afternoon, our Hop 15 earned a bronze medal. That’s it. We were hoping for a few more beers to be awarded medals but it was not to be. Am I bummed? Sure thing. It’s called expectations. We have more than a few. Did I cry about it? Nope. Did I say that it’s just a “crapshoot?” Nope. Why? Because at the end of the day, it remains the best judged competition in the world. AND, if the judges (even the bone headed ones) figure there are better beers on the table (than ours), then that’s the way it works.

This year some of the biggest players in the industry got shut out. It happens every year. We HOPE that it doesn’t happen to us but we were one bronze medal away from joining their frustrations. It sucks (being shut out). But it doesn’t mean we go all chicken little and revert to the “sky is falling” speech patterns.

One medal is nice. More is always appreciated. Yet, if you stood at our booth during any of the first three sessions, you would know that our beer was certainly appreciated. So much so, that we ran out before the end of the third session. Considering that we shipped extra beer for the event, this came as a surprise. We may not have added numerous new medals to our collection but that’s okay. We continue to find consumers eager to embrace our beers.

San Diego wracked up another 13 GABF medals and AleSmith won the Small Brewery of the Year Award. Congratulations to Peter and Company for their acheivement. This means a San Diego based brewery has now won a Small Brewing or Brewpub award at the GABF 4 times since 2003. That says A LOT! Our Pizza Port brothers in Carlsbad won 5 awards which pretty much means they kicked more ass than most states. All told, this is an amazing place to brew and drink beer.

Yes, we may have fell short by our standards of excellence. Not everyone can be Firestone Walker. Mad props to Matt, Freckles and the crew. Their Passion for Pale is obvious. Another GABF is in the books. We’ll have to wait until late September of next year to find out who comes out on top. If I was a betting man, I would have to put some money on the breweries of San Diego coming out ahead of the pack. It seems like old hat but it’s true.

It’s Friday morning and the 2008 Great American Beer Festival has finished judging all the beers. I am hearing numbers near 3000 beers this year. It will surpass the 2008 World Beer Cup as the largest commercial beer competition in the world. These my friends are exciting times.

Now that my judging duties are done, I can turn my energies to more pressing things (also known as relaxing and getting my drink on) Tonight, I will work the festival floor before heading back to the hotel to consume many of the remaining bottles from the competition. When I finally pass out, it better be for good. You see, I have trouble sleeping the night before the awards. It’s silly but very true.

Tomorrow, around 11 AM, I will hopefully wake and make preparations for the Saturday and the awards ceremony. We’ll gather for our annual Chipotle visit and ensure that we do not break from tradition. This dates back to 2003 when Jeff and I won small brewpub brewery of the year. Since then, you can count on seeing us at Chipotle on Saturday before the fest. We’ll inhale a burrito before heading to the hall.

It will be an antsy morning and early afternoon as we wait for the ceremony. It’s crazy. But then, Chris Swersey will take that stage and with his first “welcome,” it will be go time. As I mentioned in my previous post, I think the beers we have sent this year are amazing. There are always question marks and beers that didn’t travel well but at the end of the day, I have never been more confident about our beers. And confidence in our beers isn’t something I lack. We’ve sent 11 beers. So let’s break them down for you here.

Tomorrow, around 2:00 we’ll find out how we have fared. Let’s just say my expectations are incredibly high. My parents have even traveled to Denver to be a part of the festivities. We’ll open the ceremony like last year with Judgment Day. It took the Gold Medal in Specialty Beers last year and we never looked back. It didn’t win in San Diego but was very well received. The batch we have sent is amazing and really should stand out. However, rumor on the street is that there were “many” beers brewed with raisins entered this year. No surprise there. A raisin beer has won the Gold twice in the last 3 years. If Judgment Day hits the board, it might signal a monster day for us.

We won’t have to wait too long as our next beer is Brouwer’s Imagination Saison and its entered in category 14. American-Belgo Style Ale. This beer won a bronze medal at the World Beer Cup so I know it plays well with the judges. What remains to be seen is how this new category shakes out. I have my thoughts but will share them later. Matt Boney wants to crash the stage should this beer win. Look for a smiling publican if it does.

Cuvee de Tomme will rocket from the gates next at Category 18 Wood and Barrel Aged Sour. Cuvee is our most decorated beer AND it has won the last two Gold Medals at the 2007 GABF and 2008 World Beer Cup. How do I feel about our chances. Let’s just say that Cuvee rarely misses and leave it at that.

The very next category is Aged or Vintage beers. We have 2 beers entered here. The Angel’s Share 2006 and Veritas 003. I think we have two amazing beers in this field of beers. I hate competing with two beers in the same category but this was the best fit. Everyone in our tasting panel picked The 2006 Angel’s Share on their lists. I certainly agree with them. Veritas 003 will most likely get bounced for wood flavors but you just never know…

We’ll have to wait for a while as the lager categories will munch up a good portion of the middle rounds. We come back to play at category at Category 47 Imperial IPA. We entered Hop 15 here. Given how many great Double IPA’s are out there, you won’t find me holding my breath on this one. I didn’t even place it in our top 8 beers which count towards the Brewery of the Year Awards. Awesome beers rule this category. I would like to grace the stage again someday for Hop 15 so let’s hope.

They’ll march through the rest of the American Styles before heading for Belgium. We have entered several beers here. First up is Ne Goeien Saison. This was the collaborative beer that we brewed with Hildegard from Urthel. It’s pretty spot on and may be the best chance we’ve had at winning this award. I’m hoping it happens. The beer scored very well in our tasting panel. Would’t surprise me in the least.

The next category is Belgian and French Style Ales. We dropped Devotion in here to see what would happen. Most of the tasters mentioned too bitter for style. I won’t be ignorant of their scores. However, I still think the softness of this beer makes it a wild card for me.

We’ll be watching the board intently as category 62 is Sour Ales. We have entered Red Poppy and Isabelle Proximus here. I just can’t get away from the marvelous depth of flavors that Isabelle puts forth. This was a unanimous pick last weekend at our tasting. For me, it would be very special. All five of the Brett Pack would join me on stage. That is a photo I’m hoping for.

Red Poppy won a Silver Medal at the World Beer Cup. It’s an awesome beer. I just think it will get buried at this competition. I would love to be pleasantly surprised but wouldn’t bet the farm on it. This is one burly category filled with amazing beers.

Last but certainly not least will be Serpent’s Stout. This is category 72 Imperial Stout. This beer has aged so gracefully, I can’t help but think it has a legitimate shot. This is one mother of a category as well. Even so, this beer tops my list along with Isabelle Proximus.

That’s it. Tomorrow at 1:30, Mayor Hickenlooper will exit the stage and it will be go time. It’s ridiculous to think about a monster day at the GABF given our success of late. But, we’ve put in the the time so forgive us for dreaming of riches and glory. My guys have earned it as well. We’ll see you out there…

Some 21 years ago, Gina Marsaglia and her brother Vince found themselves as owners of a little hole in the wall pizza establishment on the coast in Solana Beach (North County San Diego). This was long before Stone, AleSmith and Ballast Point helped put San Diego on the map as a beer town. Nope, back in 1987, there wasn’t any local craft brewed beer on tap at Pizza Port Solana Beach (although there was Sam Adams and Lowenbrau Dark).

Gina and Vince grew up in Colorado. Vince even did a summer work stint at Coors Brewing Company. This was long before a marketing genius figured Coors drinkers weren’t smart enough to know when their beer was cold enough to drink and thus developed the “blue mountains.”

Every year since 1993 when the brewery was installed Gina and Vince have headed back to Denver to attend the Great American Beer Festival. And each year, they have had the same conversation… “Wouldn’t it be great if our beer was available in Colorado?” Well Virginia there is a Santa Claus and starting tomorrow September 10, 2008 Port Brewing and Lost Abbey beers will finally be available in Colorado.

And to celebrate, we have asked “The King” (Chris Black of Falling Rock) to throw a party in honor of our arrival. The festivities kick off around 5:30 on Blake street and promise to be one hell of a party. We shipped out two fresh kegs of Wipeout IPA and Hop 15 along with Witch’s WIt and Judgment Day. Chris also received a special stash of Isabelle Proximus which he will make available as well. All told it promises to be a fantastic evening of drinking.

I will be flying out to Denver mid day on Wednesday and will remain in Colorado until Friday so that I can do a sales meeting with our new distributor Elite- Brands. If you haven’t heard of Elite Brands by now, that’s ok. The only thing you need to know about them is that they also are distributing Russian River which means there hopefully will be an abundance of well hopped California IPA and Double IPA streaming into the state to sit on the shelves.

I, for one, am excited to finally cross Colorado off our list of places to get to. It will be so very nice to stand in our booth at the Great American Beer Festival next month and be able to tell consumers where they can get our beers. Colorado is home to some of the best beer drinkers in the world. We hope like hell we will be able to satisfy their taste buds.

Post Great American Beer Festival, it looks like we will turn our attention to the Midwest and seek out some distribution in the greater Chicago area. We have been looking at this market long enough and it is time to move some beer towards the Great Lakes. If all goes well, you might even see some Lost Abbey beers on the shelves in time for Christmas. That won’t suck.

Lastly for the Northern California peeps, tomorrow our truck will point north towards the Bay Area in order to restock some of the stores in Northern California who have been supporting our brands. Look for a fresh set of Hop 15 bottles to arrive on scene along with numerous draft beers. If all goes well, some of these may even be on tap this weekend.

When I was growing up, my family made an annual visit to a small campground known as Limekiln State Beach just south of Big Sur, California. Each and every August, we would hitch my grandparents 5th wheel trailer to the back of my dad’s large pickup truck and go beach camping as our family vacation.

It was usually a week long trip punctuated by a short detour to Monterey, California so that my father could watch the historic car races at Laguna Seca. I suppose this yearly indoctrination into motorsports (with an eye on the classics) taught me about passion and a metalic vs fiberglass artform.

My father was and always as been an admirer of Ferraris. Many of the automobiles that we would go to watch race had been champion GT racers back in the late 50’s and 1960’s. It was an amazing experience to walk amongst these great cars and their storied legacies. And the Italians taught me a thing or two about passion.

I haven’t been back to Laguna Seca in years but to this day, I am still a “fan” of auto racing. I enjoy the speed, the crashes and the fantastic finishes. I don’t travel to watch races but I have been known to get caught up watching them on TV. Best of all, they are excellent companions to beer drinking. I should also point out, that brewing is a lot like racing. You get to drink lots of beer, there’s always danger and flames involved and you have to fix things that are always breaking down at the wrong time.

Last night reminded me of this. I spent 3 hours watching Jimmies, Bobbies, Elliot’s and William’s (err Bill’s) turn make left turns for hours on end. And you know what, I did it without a lite or extra cold beer in site. Although, I also dozed off for a bit and found myself in a NASCAR slumber.

Stretched out on the couch, and having nodded off, I had this reincarnation of sorts. I was no longer Tomme Arthur. Nope, my marketing gurus had shortened my names to something less Germanic and more marketable. In a flash, I had become Timmee Edwards. Now Timmee sounds and looks like Tomme. I even had a drunken female fan once call me Timmy at a beer fest so it can’t be that far off base. Edward is my middle name so they were keeping it in the “family” I suppose.

Now, in my dream, I was actually a brewer. And like NASCAR drivers, I was a figurehead. I was the front man, pitch man and spokesperson for a group of people known as Port Brewing and The Lost Abbey. This meant that I had a team who supported me (not unlike a real brewery) and obligations to the fans and my sponsors…

Did I just say sponsors? Brilliant! This is what every brewer needs if we are going to take this Craft Brewing thing to the next level. Sure, I don’t think wearing a boil retardant jump suit is how myself or Brooklyn Oliver (Garret’s new more racing like name) want to go through life. Of course, he already has more patches than I do. But sponsors have their demands. And one of them is product placement. So we’ll have to wear the patches as badges of honor.

My new marketing guys drew me into one of their strategic meetings and I found myself being asked to work up a list of potential suitors. I started to imagine all of the possibilities for “financing” our operation here in San Marcos. It started with a title sponsor. Every big time operation needs one of these. You gotta think big when it comes to this. So, I started thinking. Well, on many mornings, I am known to throw back a Dr Pepper or two (leaded and unleaded I like them both) for sponsor sake. That’s pretty big time.

I could be the first Professional Brewer to be sponsored by a soda company. What sort of message would that send? Would it help me with MADD? Doubtful. Nothing short of being sponsored by a water company could help me there. A water company? Why of course, I drink water each and every day. But then again, most of them are owned by soda corps.

I watched a guy named Ricky smash up his Snicker’s Car last night. Maybe I could get me a Candy manufacturer to sponsor me? Sure thing. I like all kinds of Candy. How about we go after Mentos? They seem to be all the rage on the internet these days. We could use an internet presence.

Nope, tried the Mentos thing. They’ve already partnered with Diet Coke so Timmee Edwards is out of luck there. Well, how about a local angle? We could go and get WD-40? They are a local based company with national distribution. Besides, who doesn’t need a good penetrating lubricant? I hear old people even use it on their joints for their arthritis?

All of these options left my head spinning so I left the Marketing guys in their meeting and headed out to a brewer’s meeting. I’ve been on the circuit for quite a few years now so I know most of the guys pretty well. I know which way Robby Tod leans at the end of each night. I’ve come to the conclusion that Good Old Dickie Canwell was right in dropping that “T” from his last name. Can’t just isn’t in his vocabulary when it comes to brewing.

Some of the Brewers were grumbling as usual.Not everybody was happy when the Brewer’s Association signed that contract. A few felt that they would be slighted. Lord knows our “sport” should focus on everyone and not a select group of media darlings. They cried out.

It was a tough transition on some of the old guard. They weren’t ready to be placed in uniforms and drug through the pomp and cirmcunstances required by a move to the big time. A few of these old timers looked like Stay Puff Marshmellow Men in these Brewing Suits. I suppose that’s TV for you. It adds ten lbs too. But, that’s what happens when you sign a multi year deal with the network. They own you.

It sucks. Each and every year, we now have commercial breaks during the awards ceremony at the GABF. Didn’t use to be that way. What can I say? That’s the price we pay for dreaming big. Our Annual Craft Brewers Conference is now a Dog and Pony show more about interviews and autographs. Everything it seems is all about the fans. And now that we’ve taken this thing to the next level, we’ll have cool stuff like Timme Edwards 08 for Play Station. From the Marketing materials…

“If you’ve ever wanted to be like Timmee, here’s your chance. You’ll be given the same ingredients and budgets as Timmee. See if you can out manuever, outlast and out think a great brewer. Do you have it in you? Can you take down Cuvee de Tomme or The Angel’s Share?

There will of course be interactive fan forums. These will be up close and personal meet and greet sessions. Timmee will of course oblige the sensible fans and sign all manner of body parts from the most discerning of female fans. Male fans need not bother.

In order to create some interest and drama, we’ll all have to stop getting along. We’ll need a bad boy or two. Somebody who is always crossing over the line, flirting with the rules. “If you ain’t cheating, you ain’t brewing.” That’s what they tell me…

We’ll have to develop a chase for the cup system. We’ll need an annual cup system to determine the ”Best” brewer. Of course the network will have a say in this. It will be in our best interest to let an outside organization tell us what we need.

And after 20 years of major sponsorships, network deals and in fighting, we’ll all be able to sit around as we enshrine the old guard and indoctrinate the new guard each year at a televised awards show. Someday, I will have a need to retire from this sport. I’ll be too old to Dry Hop Well. I won’t have the vision to create things like Cuvee any more. And each and every day, there will be some hot shot young Turk looking to get up in my grill and disrepect my knowledge of Brewing. It’s inevitable.

But when it’s time for me to retire from this sport, I want my plaque to read “This good old boy was a master at mashing left and but let’s not forget he was pretting good at hopping right as well…”

That my friends is the Legend of Timmee Edwards. It is neither fact nor fiction. What is true is that when I woke up from my nap last night, some guy named Jimmie had turned left for 500 miles and won the race. Not bad for another guy from San Diego.

Currently, we are the midst of a brewing revolution in this great nation of ours. Craft Brewed beers(for the purposes of my arguement here- beers brewed by artisans, artists and passionate brewers- think non industrialists) are experiencing phenomenal growth. These are the beers that people like Allagash, Avery, Three Floyds and many other brewers make. These are also the beers of my good friend Vinnie who master brews at Russian River Brewing Company.

Vinnie has the amazing series of beers that may or may not be “Belgian Influenced” which all end in the suffix “tion.” We love Vinnie. We love the beers and it’s so much fun sometimes to consider the possibilities in the “tion” sequence. We also recently released a beer called “Devotion” and that sparked a consumer to ask me if I was looking to have a whole line of “tion” beers as well. I mentioned this was not the case but that I have fun with the naming process and have even lobbed a few Vinnie’s way.

So, today I thought I would finally blog about all the “tion” beers you may never see. These are the beers of my imagination and as such only based loosely on moderate innebriation. This is a list of beers that won’t be produced by Vinnie and his merry band of elves then.

10.) Caramelization– An all caramel malt beer. Vinnie abhors the use of caramel malt above a judicious amount. His notion of Judicioius is about 1/10th that of most brewers. He equates it with the Belgian ideals of spicing. If you can discern which Caramel malt he has used, he simply has used too much.

9.) Relaxation– Seriously! There is too much to be done. Vinnie is a tireless worker. I have heard through the grapevine that he works 20 hours a day and has developed a bat like ability to sleep upside hanging from the rafters after he is done dry hopping at night. I am hoping in the not so distant future to acquire this ability. Sort of a Jedi like “I am seeking Yoda” moment.

8.) Guestimation– This is another one of those beers you’re just not sure which style of beer it fits into. Therefore, you are left like most with a best case scenario approximation of where it fits. Me, I chose the word Guestimation as sometimes, we as brewers love to keep people guessing about the beers we’re making. Alternate name- See also Procrastination(keep them waiting too)!

7.) Profligation– An homage beer designed for the thoughtful and those wishing to bow at the altar of greatness that is Vinnie. Barrel aged and becoming increasingly easier to acquire these days. Most certainly, this will see more widespread distribution next year. This is great news for those making the pillgrimage to Santa Rosa to visit their Deity.

6.) Convention– A stronger version of Profligation, this beer brewed once a year will be released at the Winnie Convention. While this Winnie Convention has yet to be santioned by a formal organization, there will no doubt come a day when the faithful “Winnie’s” of the world organize and descend on Santa Rosa each year. You can only earn the Title of being a “Winnie”(wannabe Vinnie) by attempting to clone Pliny the Elder at home. Attempting to brew Pliny the Elder at home gets you bonus points into the club as well.

5.) Consternation– Hell hath no fury like the wrath of a Vinnie scorned. I know. I have seen it. Most are unlikely to have witnessed this. A beer the color of boiling red with vituperative laced bite. A bitter beer that makes an appearance only when the time is right.

4.) Pontification– Another one of those beers that just makes you go “hmm? How did he do it?” And like a magician, he will talk to you with his right hand all the while spiking your glass with Brettanomyces leaving you in awe of his magical powers. I know… I too have been amazed.

3.) Recollection– This is a very heavy beer. It bears the weight of a singular thought- the very thought of recalling a beer based world lacking the infusion of Vinnie. I shudder at the thought each time I recount my world before Vinnie. It’s a very ominous beer to say the least. Thankfully, our world is constantly enriched with Vinnie and as such, we are not force into moments of introspection and recollection of a pre Vinnie Brewing Society.

2.) Speculation– With all these amazing small batch beers being released, it is only a matter of time before he releases the greatest one bottle beer of all time known simply as “Speculation.” As only one bottle will ever be released, the owner is simply left wondering…” I wonder what it tastes like? I wonder if I will ever open it? Screw that, I wonder what it’s worth? ” And this goes hand in hand with all the people who are buying the other barrel aged beers in the hopes that they will be able to pay for their childs college tuition in a Post Vinnie society of brewers(OOOH the Horror!!!)

Drumroll please….. Here comes the Number 1 Beer from Russian River that you’ll never see released.

1.) Vindication– Many years ago, Vinnie gave me well deserved CRAP for naming a beer after myself. He told me he would never do that for one of his beers(name one after himself- not me!) So, if we are ever going to see Vindication, I am guessing that project will fall on my shoulders. The beer will have to be stark yellow lacking any caramel flavor. It will be easily dry hopped in a relaxing manner. We are only left with the best case Guestimation of when this will be. We’re quite certain the label will include a picture of Vinnie seated on the altar. It will most likely be released in conjunction with the First ever Winnie Convention(though not an officially liscensed product) which will force us into some measure of adjudication. He’ll be mad as hell that we used his likeness. The beer will force consumers everywhere to pontificate on whether to buy such a beer. Vinnie will still be one of only a handful of people able to recall a pre Vinnie beer society. There will be mass speculation for this beer. It will initially be offered for $1K per 187ml bottle and the project will crash and burn in Vindication because it’s not like I don’t have enough things going on around here either. I suppose we should get to work on Procrastination Vindication? An homage to our great friend to the north?

Have you ever seen the movie “American Pie” where the one girl phrases her whole life by referencing “this one time at band camp.” Well, two weeks ago, I was presented with an amazing opportunity to sample a beer bottled in 1869. With this in mind, I have decided that from now on, all of my stories will be started with this in mind. “Man we brewed a batch of Double IPA last week that almost killed me. Still, it had to be easier than those guys who brewed that beer from 1869. How about last week when I found myself in a conversation. “You know, this one time in 1869…” Hopefully you get the picture. To most historians,1869 is a very important year- include me on that list.

So follow me as we go back in time through the pages of history. It’s 1869. A civil war has recently ravaged our country. Think North vs. South. That’s what our history books have always led me and my Manifest Destiny brethren to believe. Yet, lately I become much less American Centric in my views of history. Stepping off planes, trains and buses in Europe has a way of shaking the foundations of importance and the educational system of our country that views our history above all else. I suppose it’s due in part to not having been bombed or marched through as part of a longer running timeline?

Out West, we forget that our country, the one we currently occupy, started innocently enough in 1492. That is if you believe that Columbus was the first to land on our shores. So way back in 1492, we were “discovered.” Yet looking towards Europe and England around the same time period, we’re left considering a whole separate world of discovery on the doors of a church.

But really you’re thinking. Enough of the history. Let’s talk beer. Well, 1869 is now an incredibly important to the life of Tomme Arthur as it frames the oldest bottle of beer that I have ever had the privilege to taste. And for the record, I would drink water from 1869, if I didn’t think it would kill me. Just so that I could see how miserable it was.

Prior to this bottle of beer from 1869, the oldest bottle of beer that I was able to sample was a Thomas Hardy Ale from 1968. Thanks to the generosity of Tom Nickel of O’Briens Pub and Dr. Bill Sysak, I had the opportunity some three years ago to sample not one but three vintages of this epic ale. As a brewer, I considered myself incredibly lucky to have sampled the entire vertical of the Thomas Hardy Ales. It was another once in a lifetime opportunity.

But let’s get back to the beer from 1869. Recently, our great friend Mark Dorber of the famed White Horse in London, acquired some incredibly rare vintages of Vintage Bass Ales. The 1869 was rumored to be part of this stash and Mark indeed received 15 bottles. I had heard this to be the case and figured “I need to taste that.”

It’s one thing to want, it’s another to need but sometimes, you just have to beg the crack dealer to give you some dope when you need it. And I was in need of some serious 1869 smack.

So it was, that when our European adventure was being planned, Mark ask innocently enough if there was something that we might “fancy” in the realm of English Specialty beers. As a publican of one of the best bars known to man, I didn’t doubt his ability to acquire this beer. Also, I didn’t ask for one beer as to seem overly needy so I started with a request for some JHB (Jeffery Hudson Bitter) that I fell in love with many years ago. This was a slam dunk even for white British guys who have no leaping abilities.

Next, I lobbed a mid grade request for something cask conditioned and vintage. The White Horse is famous for things in its cellars. To tell you the truth, I don’t even recall what it was. Last time we were there, it was Theakston’s Old Peculiar with Brett that was indeed Peculiar and Awesome!

In closing my email, I instructed Mark that he better have not one but TWO bottles of the 1869 Ratcliffe Ale waiting for us. We were important Americans and one bottle wouldn’t suffice. I didn’t actually expect that we would get to taste this beer but I was to be pleasantly surprised.

That Thursday night after our mini pub crawl through London, we dined at the White Horse. After dinner, and prior to the stinky cheese platter, we followed Mark downstairs into the infamous White Horse Cellars. Like a proud father, he presented us with a decanter full of a ruby liquid. Immediately, I thought we were sampling some sort of dessert wine.

Mark procured a set of glasses and we were left swirling and sniffing history. None of us knew it at the time. He had conveniently left the bottle stashed. None of us correctly guessed what we were drinking nor were we even close on our dates. My best guess was something that was 20-30 years old. Certainly missed by “oh, I don’t know a hundred years!”

The beer was dark ruby red with streaks of mahogany racing through its depths. Obvious signs of oxidation were present but then again, they were not destructive in their character. The standard caramelized notes of staling beer were well into a fifth realm that turned the flavors to Sherry. I detected a pervasive smokiness and there was a rawhide quality to the beer as well.

The first sip was an explosion of confusion (under my breath thinking the whole time…”no known pathogens can live in beer- I will not die from drinking this beer”)! There was a tremendous amount of acidity but the tartness presented itself before giving way to the huge overbearing caramel notes. I’m not sure how much of something like this you are supposed to drink. But in my world, when someone opens something so scarce, you make like you are baking brownies at home and ask with politeness in your voice and a glisten in your eye “would it be acceptable to lick the bottle clean?”

Now, I have met some of the largest certifiably nuts beer enthusiasts in the world. And the thing that always amazes me about them is how magnanimous they can be with their beers. It’s very endearing. I suppose this happens in the wine world as well with oenophiles wishing to display their collections with stunning brilliance?

But here’s the rube, Mark is probably (without fail) sitting on thousands of pounds (that’s dollars) of beer. He mentioned that only 15 bottles of this Ratcliffe 1869 Ale were found. There’s no way to predict what these bottles are worth on ebay but, we’re certainly not talking about Stone 02.02.02 either.

I’ve got to believe that these bottles would easily fetch north of 5K per bottle if not more. Somebody, would have to have them. And price would follow accordingly. I have to say this was a surreal experience. It’s not that often you can touch the past in such a tangible way.

One hundred years from now when I am dead and stiff, I can only hope that the 2 cases of Angel’s Share that I have stashed will be unearthed and in sufficient shape that it will be coveted and written about. History can be pretty cool like that. Especially when it finds you 750ml at a time.